Shift Happens!

21 05 2016

Shift Happened! At The Hapuna Beach Prince Hotel this week!

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Alan Cohen’s Advanced Life Coaching Tribe gathered and created a lot of shift.
Good Shift. We shifted up, downloaded gems from teachers all over the world, and shared our life coaching skill sets with each other from all walks of life and geographic locations on the planet. And what a place to experience teachings, renewal, and to practice the life coaching skill set.

I haven’t experienced anything like this in over 5 years, and let’s just say my spiritual batteries disintegrated a bit back, yet somehow got me signed up, through my mind ego fear long enough to show up and participate. And I am so grateful!

Hawaii has a tradition of cities of refuge, for me, any Alan Cohen retreat, especially on the island of Hawaii, is just that.

If you are struggling with your spiritual connection and life “opportunities”, I could never recommend enough the need to connect with a spiritual tribe, and the chance to develop skill sets and connections with like minded individuals.

I can assure you, I never done it perfectly, become enlightened, left the darkness behind, but I have All WAYS, no matter how lost I’ve become in life, found renewal and hope. At times I’ve stayed connected, at times I’ve drifted, each develops a strength.

The biggest shift I received this week, was hope. It was also that which I needed the most.

Thank you Alan, and thank you Alan’s Tribe, for helping me seep back into light, again.





Hope Evolution

22 04 2015

I dedicate this blog, to those living in hopelessness. I’m praying happy tears for you today. When I began my journey of hope. Hope that myself and all of life was not horrible, out of control, and a useless miserable failure, my hope, was from a kernel of faith, that somehow still existed inside of me, in spite of it all. Some part of me lived, kept breathing, waking, moving. My faith came from books, because all people had proven themselves to be idiots and untrustworthy to me. They also locked me up, because of my mental behavior.

This journey of hope, began locked, in severe psychological pain, after years of faith and bust. Words, read, uncovered, hoped were real, began my journey back to life. Out of words came healthy habits. Writing my thoughts in journals, all of it. The good the bad the ugly. Over and over again. Journals clean out crap in my head, and reveal gems from time to time, if I’m patient and persistent.

Over time, my faith and hope, led me to opportunities, experiences, which led to real life, real time, face to face healing. Along the way I discovered and interacted with healthy humans, and let go of many humans stuck in behaviors that were destructive for me.

My happy tears today for people in hopelessness, is gratitude for the potential. If we can survive the hopelessness, If we can be graced with discovery and opportunity of new healing then we can evolve.

Happy tears today, are for the discovery of erosion of psychological control temporarily embedded by humans in positions of power living in their own unresolved fears into innocents. Time, healthy daily methods, new healthy information, observation and experimentation of good ideas, have continued to erode those negative unhealthy psychological destructive beliefs, behaviors, identity, and unconscious reactions to stress, given to me, and a little bit each day ejected, and eventually let go of completely.

I continue to say good bye, to other peoples fears, and hello to life is good, and getting even a little better, each day.





A Course In Miracles

3 01 2015

It’s time to admit my latest sneaky technique of wiggling past my obstructive ego. I’m cheating and benefiting from it. In order to figure out how to complete the other parts IMG_5898of my audio book I decided to purchase and listen to a few of them. I got a copy of A Course In Miracles, which I have tried and failed for 20 years to read and complete, and yet so many teachers and books are based on it or use it as a core. Anyway, it was too sleepy for me to drive with so I put it on to listen to it at night when I have(correction/had) insomnia. Here is the sneaky part, ever since I play it when I’m ready to go sleep, I drift off a lot quicker, and when I do wake up, I listen as long as I can before I’m out again. I’ve been getting 7 to 8 hours of sleep a night for about a month now. I’m not sure what the rest of the course is about, but that’s a big miracle for me.

Here is the double sneaky part. It’s having an affect on my waking hours as well. Out of curiosity of what I was downloading to my subconscious every night I went ahead and got an electronic copy of the book to read as well as redownloading an ap I tried years ago with the daily lessons.

AND, I’m kinda sorta doing them, yes I know it’s all wrong and breaking the rules of the course, but yet and, I’m feeling progress.

I’m questioning my angers and judgments. Rethinking my misperceptions, and contemplating more in depth questions than I have in a long time, and appreciating this process very much.

And even though my ego continues to freak out judge, etc, I’m gently moving forward anyway, I figure who cares if I do it right or get it right, whatever that is. What if I gently skim thru, pick up what benefits I can, and then cycle thru again. It’s what I’ve done with all of my favorite metaphysical texts over the years.

Today I read about shame and judgement. Wow, that was a shot between the third eye. Big tears, moment of growth, yet grateful. What I actually read, or maybe even heard last night was about guilt and responsibility, how they are connected. By chance I read ;Alan Cohens, “A Deep Breathe of Life “ April 19th. He always explains it with language and metaphors I can understand and begin applying in my day.

Tis the season for spiritual growth in the dark, wether we run to or from it.
Happy New Year
George





Emotional Ahh

20 10 2013

ImageI am not the extreme of my past.  I am not the extreme mental and physical choices I made to cope/interact with the chaos around and inevitably in me.

Was my past since birth totally of my creation?

If not, do I have to prescribe my entire life to it’s chaos?

What if I’m actually a calm happy creative sane functional human, temporarily held hostage by the creation and wreckage of my first 20 years, and recovery from?

As I settle once again, from another emotional hurricane, I relish in the choices I’ve made to create calm functionality in my life to return to.  None of it happened instantly.  Yet it is possible.  Yes I deal with all kinds of anxious moments, activities, etc.  But there is a calm overwhelming routine to return to.  It used to be externally only.  I followed a calm path offered by others for years in hopes of it working.

My prayer today, is to encourage, all those choosing calm routines, in spite of current internal or external chaos, to continue their journey, no matter what.  If peace is possible for me, than I hold hope for you.

george





Compassion Renewal

21 11 2010

1) I am a source, not the source of compassion on planet earth.
2) If I am not the only source of compassion, who/what is my source of compassion?
3) What is my current level of compassion for me?
4) If my current level of compassion is low, what is my favorite 10min activity for reconnecting with compassion I can do be right now?
5) If my compassion is overflowing, what is my favorite activity for sharing which allows me to feel even more light?
6) Is it ok to be empty?
7) Is it ok to renew myself?
8) Am I aware of what empties me?
9) Am I able to let go of that which empties me, whether it is job, person, place or thing?
10)If I feel stuck with an emptying source, and wish to create a new reality, is it possible for me to believe in the options available to me?
11)Is it possible for me to be compassionate for myself and others, as I change/grow/heal/renew, even if those I love and care for professionally and or family chose not to?
12)Is it possible for me to accept that good things can come of me allowing myself to heal and renew, and it might even help those I worry about?
13)Is it possible for me to renew my compassion on a regular basis, and be even better at what it is I love to do, and even feel energized, because I can simply learn to let go, let a bigger source than me takeover, and yet still enjoy being what I be/do best?
14)What if my continual connection and renewal and letting go in me, allows me to create a deep feeling of caring/compassion/strength in me, which not only serves me, but it serves those I worry about the most even more?
15)What if draining myself of compassion into empty experiences I am unable to renew myself with is actually allowing negativity to expand?
16)What if allowing myself renewal and letting go, actually allows situations to get better because I am no longer a single source of help and compassion?
17)What if my active letting go, and taking care of myself, is actually a new beginning for others, to discover within themselves active sources of compassion within, even if they need to find it in the dark night of their soul first?

Writing what I need to hear,
George





Full Circle

20 11 2010

Oops, we forgot to tell you that your journey, NO MATTER WHAT, can bring you inner peace.
pause
What’s up George?
What do you mean?
Anything can give you peace???

Yep.

What if the gifts of your journey were your greatest assets?
Rummaging around in the back of my soul lately has been several concepts dancing around until they find the right mesh to emerge, this might be one of those days.

On my updated treasure map/wall lately I put up the biggest most outrageous dream vision I can think of, a collage of Oprah holding my hand as we chat about my book and the gifts of being bipolar.
Anytime I get outrageous and think juicy thoughts about possibilities in my life and even dare to cut paper pictures to help create what I desire and glue staple or paste even attach to my fridge with magnets the biggest vision I can currently think of.
Guess what follows?

Yep, you guessed it.  I’ve renamed my inner critic, as my inner engineer.
His opening round in my head was impressive.  He said, “What the heck is Oprah going to smile about when she hears your story, and delusions about the gifts of being bipolar.”
Here is the brilliance of life coaching in action with in one’s own mind.
This is why I’m busy typing and patting myself on the back for my absolute genius of being me.
I said. “OK Mr. Engineer, what the heck would I say?”
Fortunately my inner engineer is as big of a brain as I am with attached ego, and he didn’t hesitate for a second.  Inner Peace.
That stumped me, but I soon found the thread I was chatting about earlier wandering around in the back cave of my soul.
What if the gifts of my journey are my greatest assets?
What if my daily practice of applying positive thinking techniques to the opportunities in my life for the past 20 years has produced a very toxic by product with a life of it’s own.
What if no matter what is going on, if I can somehow find my way back to a positive thought opening, I get hope in the present.
What if taking positive actions no matter what over many years has led to…here it is…inner peace for having taken the action. What if years of thinking positive thoughts, taking positive actions, has led to an asset in me which no car, relationship, job, house, financial statement, health issue, big or small, can take away.
Right George, I know you, you’re not peaceful all the time why just the …
You’re right Mr. Engineer (I give my inner critic a surname because he pays more attention when I stroke his ego), You’re right Mr. Engineer, would you please go back through the history in our mind and sum up the percentage of inner peace I felt 20 years ago verses today?  Would you please place on a scale the amount it takes to throw me off today verses….
OK OK OK, I get it replies Mr. Engineer.
Let me rephrase my original statement, positive thinking techniques consistently applied no matter what over time develop an inner asset, nothing can take away.  Yes crap happens.  Yes I get pissy upset angry angst etc etc etc.  But here is the newsflash, they are not the predominant themes between my ears anymore.  Do some events kick my inner guru butt much more than others? Of course.  But the next time around they don’t.
By the tone of my words it’s sounds like I’ve found my soap box which is not always a peaceful place because ego is usually not that far off.  So I will acknowledge right here huge gratitude for the events in my life these last three months that have led me back to that which I love to share with anyone, anywhere, whenever I can, inner peace.

Loving silence,
George

http://www.georgedenslow.com





What if?

16 11 2010

I felt a chunk of my inner iceberg melt the other day.

What if I’m actually a peaceful still person and always have been?

What if people really have seen the inner me reflect through my inner darkness?

What if the extreme swings inside me are just a defensive mental reaction to compensate for the illusion of scarcity?

What if my bursts of anger are actually a surge of injustice when my outer world has not reflected my inner world of peace and stillness?

What if my last two years of sitting in stillness whenever possible has actually rebooted the being that I am?

What if I at last I can be the me that I am?

What if it is possible to relax into what I naturally am, a person obsessed with stillness, allowing the threads of peace to weave thru me, seeping into the ahh of inner soul connection expression?

What if I am the person I always immerge from my caves as, a positive minded happy soul?

What if all the crap I’ve created in my life, is just a reflection of the illusion of scarcity and chaos I’ve let myself collapse into in times of overwhelm?

What if I allow myself to continue this path of stillness and joy?

What if I could receive from this place of inner being, what if I could be rewarded for dwelling here, hearing the threads of peace re weave as needed?  What if I were truly able to let go of those I allow to trigger me, or I allow to suck the light out of me, or allow to be chaos long enough that I believe in their current illusion and make it my own?

What if I’m actually a functional being of stillness, light and joy, as naturally as breathing?

What if I’ve always been this way?

What if life truly is this easy?

What if this journey to my stillness, is the strength I desire to be stillness?

What if my distractions from inner peace have actually been this huge map of life and all the dressed up versions of illusions have led me back to the place I chose first as a child?

What if my intimate familiarity with all the illusion rides of scarcity in life have led me to be an inner peace guide?

What if bipolar is a very inclusive ride, to learn about ADD, PTSD, Depression, mania, etc etc etc, so that I could teach stillness from the inside out for the rest of my life in the ease of being me?

What if this huge illusion of bipolar disorder, manic depression, is just a childhood brain adjustment for dealing with vision and empathy of better times, created by an active imagination?

What if all the ways out of my inner hell, are all the ways I can teach anyone interested in their ease, with any size of bump or vision, become again who they really already are?

What if?

George





Knock Knock Receive

10 11 2010

Receive???

Hmm, let me get back with you on that and what can I do for you, today?

It would appear that there is a whole generation of us new age healer types that have locked on solid to transmitting love caring and nurturing, and are completely clueless about receiving.

It probably has something to do with trust issues.

Oh how quaint and mushy woo woo George you are making me nauseous.

Hey pal, thank you for your service and love to the world but the last time I checked, your tank is looking dry and your headlights are a bit dim.

Hmm.

So what is this receive stuff you are chatting about?

In my sphere of influence lately I overheard “someone like you, who gives so much, deserves anything you want.”

This is where I stop the broadcast and reach out to all of my soul brothers and sisters on the healing journey attempting to figure out the lessons of receiving and have a collective virtual group hug.  Ahh, much better.  Thank you.

Let’s figure this out together.

Many of us grew up and learned how to be incredibly giving solo artists, with no thought of return(which is actually quite beautiful if you think about it.)  Many of us learned positive metaphysics from amazing spiritual teachers,  and have developed our skills to an exquisitely  deep soul level.

And many of us have lived small being big, transmitting huge energy soul assets, with out a clue about why our bodies were falling apart our souls were quietly suffering and being freaked out about our next food and mortgage payments.

So I’ll begin this discussion;  It would appear our next lesson to figure out is receiving.  We are excelling at giving, no more lessons needed there, we be that as easily as we breathe, now it’s about being willing to be nurtured, in as equal a way in which we give.(yeah, THAT big.)

So please join me if you will on this quest of healing ourselves and figuring out what the clues, crumbs, baby food lessons of receiving are about.

So far for me, the book Soul Currency, by Fred Chu appears to be amazing.  I think this guy has been thru this and can help us figure it out too.

Happy trails to you and receiving this fine day,

George





Seed Speed

8 11 2010

Lately I’ve been giving myself a lot of shit lately about my speed.  If I’m so blah blah blah, than why am I not XYZ.  Breathe, George, breathe.  Ahh, better, I’ve been having one of those mornings.

So that’s nice George what have you been being about it and why are you sharing this?

Because by allowing myself to be in the dark side of my moon mind, and allowing myself to be authentically growling while growing through the motions of being “spiritual”, drinking coffee(I consider 100% Kona coffee consumption a sacred time honored ritual), writing in journal all the crap floating in my head(ok so maybe falling asleep having the current drama tv show staring at me is not “spiritual”), and reading this new awesome book in my life, Spiritual Currency, by Fred Chui, breathe(apologies for run on mind flow sentences)(I’m getting to the point here).  Because of the dark side of my moon this morning, I’m arriving at an okness about me.  This is my gift to myself for allowing my current “real self” and “spiritual self” attempt to communicate with each other this AM.

After further spiritual study and the usual OMG I’ve done it all wrong self-judgment phase filtered thru I was able to soothe myself from my “spiritual” studies by playing guitar for awhile (probably the most spiritual thing I’ve done today).

I was still physically anxious and active so I tripped over my dumbbells and since I was feeling like one I decided to lift them for awhile, and then I got distracted by a mess on my paperwork table and saw an image of a treasure map idea to put on my treasure map wall(I’ve given up on small pieces of cardboard artistically arranged pieces of art) I just see image; copy, cut or rip, staple, WHAM, wall.  ADD?, yes.

Wall.

Hmm.

I’m using a wall, large wall, one of many, to create a treasure map.  (Basic prosperity exercise, collect images you desire or uplift you of activities, things, and or experiences you would like to manifest, and create a collage to look at and help you create what you want next in your life.)

Let’s back track here.

15 years ago I was using the dashboard of my residency for a treasure map/altar of my “studio” while going through the Artist Way with Julie Cameron.  It was a 1983 used dodge colt hatchback (very small compact car).

Now I’m using a wall.

It would appear the inside of my seed.(living space representing inside of my head), is bigger.

If following the prosperity principles while living in a tiny car, have lead to living in a huge space, than maybe this stuff is real.

Maybe I’m not in the ideal soul flow I want to be in, but thank God I’m not satisfied yet, and I’m striving for more.  Maybe my seed is not speeding along and accomplishing like I think I should, maybe my life is happening exactly as it needs to.

Even if I haven’t manifested the “perfect” income source, at least I’ve manifested income.  Maybe I haven’t learned bipolar financial management, but at least I’m still willing to be in the game.  (I still get to be my own attendant/patient/manager of my own asylum/home/life)

Maybe life is not about the speed of my seed, maybe life is about laughing at my ridiculousness, and enjoying what is, with a delicious cup of Kona.

Thank you universe for the current lessons I’m obsessing about, and the physical comfort and lifestyle I get to dance it with.

Life,

George

 





Woo Woo Kindergarten

16 10 2010

Love.  Now.

If I only had two words I could take with me for the rest of my life to a deserted island in the sea.  These are the only two words I would ever need.

Love. Now.

Before I accepted the modern western science word and definition of bipolar disorder, manic depression, I came across writings about shamanism in literature and anthropology classes in college.

My internal experience was extremely dysfunctional, dark, and angry at the time.  I was less than a year out of the mental institute, daily user of marijuana, and binge drinking whenever I could afford it or b.s. my way into a party.

I was scared enough about being locked up again that I was somehow able to overcome the monsters inside me enough not to get fired at my job to support school and attend classes, but the inside of my head would have scared the psych ward.

Being hospitalized highlighted and traumatized the mental state I was in, yes it kept me physically safe from hurting myself, and gave my family a rest from dealing with me, but it really only gave me a hard “right turn here Clyde whack” (80’s Clint Eastwood movie reference) into desperately searching for a healing in my life.(which is all good now and I am extremely grateful for)(yes it took many years to see the good and come to the mental/physical healing conclusion in my being).

Where was I?  Oh yes, bipolar and shamanism.  I related to shamanism first, before I accepted the term and definition of bipolar.

The physical descriptions of weird behavior, muttering, isolation, non function in society, and leading ceremonies and strange combinations of physical objects or attire.

I actually laughed out loud and sprayed my coffee in the middle of a college class when I came across the description the first time in the book.

Why?

Cut and paste the previous paragraph of the physical description of shamans, attach my face to it and put it up as a poster boy for.

I never heard of the word shamanism, (I grew up in remote Alaska in the 70’s)(Parents didn’t “do” the sixties”)(translation-our American culture has evolved a lot, thank God)(I promise to cut down on parenthesis if they drive you nuts)(ok just one more I obviously have a lot to say today, I must be making up for my silent journey as of late.)

It wasn’t long after the seeds of shamanism were planted in my soul, that I sobered up by attending 12 step programs, and discovered positive metaphysics courses and teachers, which I have been devouring ever, sense.

Like any rambunctious puppy smelling out new adventures, I tried everything:  hence the words I use, woo woo, new age, tarot, psychic, channeling, angels, medicine cards, etc. etc. etc.

Sometimes I attended, sometimes I did it.  Startling enough I was actually really good at it, and could easily have pursued a career in it because people paid me and asked me to do it more. (huge side track I’ll write about some other time, quick answer: Bipolar/shamans, have inside track to the unseen/nonverbal world)

I quickly observed something though.

This might piss a few people off, but here goes;

It’s all about love; it’s all about now.

Every shamanic, voo doo, woo woo, psychic, you name experience I ever had, ALWAYS, always, always, led me back to the present moment life issues, and always the same way to heal the trauma revealed or energy to pursue the dream revealed was love.

So does that mean you don’t recommend following anything George?  Does that mean you should do nothing and just meditate in a room? Nope.  I tried that too.  In fact I even went to China to the ancient caves that the people before the Taoists meditated in and meditated there.

If I were to add a third word to my deserted island vocabulary it would be YES.

Explore everything, taste, feel, channel, listen, sing, play, express, receive.  It’s why we are here.  It’s why we created all these flavors on the buffet.

And if it becomes overwhelming, ungrounded, or scary in anyway,

Just re-member, the word, LOVE, and NOW.

Here is how:

Put your hands on your chest.  Breathe.  Keeping taking deep slow breaths until you feel calm, and ready to explore, yell, play, scream, dance, cry, feel, work, or what ever appears next in your dance of life.

Luv yas,

George

 








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