Surf Sessions

18 09 2009

It’s a new day, a new place, and an awesome cup a coffee.

A good friend of mine pointed out the other day that maybe I was cravin a bit of Adventure.

The first day I timidly took my moody self on a slightly adventurous road trip and discovered several awesome really cool new places near my house and some very peaceful places to pull over be mellow and enjoy nature.

I woke up again yesterday and realized I’ve got something going on deep inside me that hasn’t risen to the surface yet.  I pay attention to these bubbles because I know from experience if I avoid them, then a deep dark trigger, runaway high is just around the corner, not a natural visionary high but a run run escape be high avoid growth type which can turn very negative.

When I deal with these rumblings inside me, I need to sit and listen.  Sometimes being in my quiet safe house is healthy and I work through it.  Sometimes it becomes isolation and avoidance as well.

This time I chose the road trip cure.  Since my income is not attached to a local, I can work anywhere with wi fi, I loaded up and went for a cruise to a state park I haven’t visit yet.

Letting myself enjoy the day of new sights smells and vistas is usually always a good way for me to gently probe on the back burners of my mind.

In the midst of processing the current what ever it is that’s showing up, I’m having an awesome day.

A new beach, new smells, interesting people, a great little coffee shop, and nothing like fresh Atlantic sea air.

Every now and then a deep spontaneous sigh has come through me, and my body relaxes just a little more, and I can tell my mind is slowing and being a little ok for a moment as well.  Is it easy? Not really, would I rather take a pill and fix it? Not really.

My intuition tells me it is accumulated stress from making so many leaps with my dreams, not having everything figured out, and just flat out going for it and saying yes.  I have many gambles in the air right now.  I’m reaching out more then I ever have to offer who and what I am as a source of good.

So I also hear the gentle voice inside me say, it’s ok to sit.  It’s ok to meditate, it’s ok to ask spirit to help.

It’s also ok to be nervous excited and happy to be see experience long term go-alls come to fruition.

Balance.  Time to sit, time to wag my tail, time to let go let spirit.

Being in a dream, with my toes in the surf;




One response

18 09 2009

I can smell the salty air. I know I love the feeling-sense-experience of listening to myself on purpose.

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